So, chances are you've heard of "The 5 Love Languages" from Gary Chapman. This is a book that was written in 1995 for married couples to use in connecting deeper with each other. Two years later, he wrote one for connecting with children. Since then, "The 5 Love Languages" has become more widespread as a theory, and less so of a book. I myself haven't read the book yet, but I'd heard of the love languages a while ago.
First, let me break down the love languages (If you're already familiar with them, feel free to scroll to the little pretty lines.)
Acts of Service:
People with this love language will feel loved the most when people offer their hand in doing work. This could be yard work, chores, or even in the workplace. These people will not feel loved if people forget to finish work they said they'd do, or if special people in their life don't take the time to do something for them.
Physical Touch:
You know that one guy that always goes around giving high fives? Or that girl that always seems to be hugging people? Or a a reversal of the two? They probably have the love language of touch, and they love it. Sometimes, they may only like it from the close people around them, and sometimes they love it from everybody. This love language takes a while to find the individual's preference, but taking the time to find this out can really help make that person feel loved and secure.
Quality Time:
Quality time people love being around others. 1 on 1, a group setting, it doesn't matter. They tend to like it when people notice them and take the time to get to know them on a more personal level. Quality timers like it when others carve out a whole day just to spend time with me, and it feels great to have people pop in unexpectedly just to visit. If others around them forget to spend time with them, or keep looking away/don't pay attention, they may feel quite unloved.
Receiving Gifts:
This is actually my lowest, and hardest for me to understand, so I simply quote Gary Chapman's website:
"Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures. Gifts are heartfelt symbols to you of someone else’s love and affection for you."
Words of Affirmation:
People with the love language of words of affirmation like to be told how much they are appreciated and loved. Hearing the how much someone cares about you is important, but more so is hearing their reasoning. They love having people send them encouraging notes in times where they are down, and appreciate compliments. Telling someone with words of affirmation that they are beautiful or handsome can make their day. Forgetting speak kind words to these people can be more hurtful than you may realize.
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I've known about the love languages for a long while. For the longest time, I've known that my love language is quality time. The second has shifted several times, however, and it depends strongly on who I am thinking about when doing it.
I took the test back in October and I received the following results:
11 Quality Time
10 Words of Affirmation
5 Acts of Service
2 Physical Touch
2 Receiving Gifts
I took it again 6 months later. I took it twice, one thinking about four close friends (Larissa, and three others), and the other just thinking about Larissa. Below is listed the time where I took it thinking of those four close friends:
12 Quality Time
8 Words of Affirmation
5 Acts of Service
4 Physical Touch
1 Receiving Gifts
You might notice that this remains almost the same as before. Touch and Quality time have taken some from Words and Gifts, but for the most part it's the same general idea. But when I took the test only thinking about Larissa, I had some very different results:
9 Physical Touch
9 Quality Time
8 Words of Affirmation
4 Receiving Gifts
0 Acts of Service
So, as you can see, my preferences change on who the administrator is. I found this very interesting and enlightening. Hopefully this provided more of an insight on who I am, and you enjoyed reading about this.
Peace out!
:UPDATE:
[This post is no longer accurate, as far as the exact numbers go... I guess you might as well call me Joshua the ever-changing at this point. =P
Here's a more updated post, with accurate information regarding my languages.]
